No Fear Shakespeare
Twelfth Night
Get this No Fear to go!
Act 5, Scene 1, Page 2
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FOOL
Marry, sir, they praise me and make an ass of me, now my
foes tell me plainly I am an ass. So that by my foes, sir I
profit in the knowledge of myself, and by my friends, I am
abused. So that, conclusions to be as kisses, if your four
negatives make your two affirmatives, why then the worse
for my friends and the better for my foes.
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FOOL
Well, my friends praise me and make me look like an idiot, while my enemies tell me straightforwardly that I am an idiot. My enemies help me understand myself better, which is an advantage, and my friends help me lie about myself, which is a disadvantage. So if four negatives make two affirmatives, I’m worse off because of my friends and better off because of my foes.
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ORSINO
Why, this is excellent.
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ORSINO
That’s excellent.
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FOOL
By my troth, sir, no—though it please you to be one of my
friends.
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FOOL
Don’t say that—unless you want to be one of my friends.
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ORSINO
(giving a coin)
Thou shalt not be the worse for me: there’s gold.
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ORSINO
(he gives him a coin) You won’t be worse off because of me: here’s some money.
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FOOL
But that it would be double-dealing, sir, I would you could
make it another.
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FOOL
That’s a nice hand you dealt me. But if it’s not double-dealing, sir, I wish you’d deal me another.
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ORSINO
O, you give me ill counsel.
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ORSINO
Oh, you’re a naughty one, encouraging double-dealing.
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FOOL
Put your grace in your pocket, sir, for this once, and let your
flesh and blood obey it.
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FOOL
Ignore your virtue and nobility just this once, sir, go ahead.
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ORSINO
Well, I will be so much a sinner, to be a double-dealer.
There’s another. (giving a coin)
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ORSINO
Well, I’ll commit the sin of double-dealing, and deal you a second coin. Here it is. (he gives him another coin)
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FOOL
Primo, secundo, tertio is a good play, and the old saying is,
the third pays for all. The triplex, sir, is a good tripping
measure, or the bells of Saint Bennet, sir, may put you in
mind—one, two, three.
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FOOL
And maybe a third? You know, there’s a game called “third time’s the charm,” which is fun to play, and they always say that three’s a magic number. The three-beat rhythm is a good for dancing, and the church bells chime—one, two, three.
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