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Much Ado About Nothing

William Shakespeare

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Act 3, Scene 5, Page 2

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20
LEONATO
All thy tediousness on me, ah?
LEONATO
Oh, so you’d give me all your tediousness?



DOGBERRY
Yea, an ’twere a thousand pound more than ’tis, for I hear
as good exclamation on your Worship as of any man in the
city, and though I be but a poor man, I am glad to hear it.
DOGBERRY
Yes, even if I had a thousand more pounds than that, for I hear that you are exclaimed throughout the city, and though I am only a poor man, it makes me glad to hear it.

VERGES
And so am I.
VERGES
Me, too.

25
LEONATO
I would fain know what you have to say.
LEONATO
Gentlemen, please, I’d like to hear your news.



VERGES
Marry, sir, our watch tonight, excepting your Worship’s
presence, ha' ta'en a couple of as arrant knaves as any in
Messina.
VERGES
Sir, our watch tonight—expectfully, sir—has captured a couple of the worst criminals in Messina.


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35
DOGBERRY
A good old man, sir. He will be talking. As they say, “When
the age is in, the wit is out.” God help us, it is a world to see!
Well said, i' faith, neighbor Verges.—Well, God’s a good
man. An two men ride of a horse, one must ride behind. An
honest soul, i' faith, sir, by my troth he is, as ever broke
bread, but God is to be worshipped, all men are not alike,
alas, good neighbor!
DOGBERRY
(to LEONATO) Verges is a good old man, sir, but he’s always babbling. Like they say, “When age comes, wit goes.” God help us, what a world! (to VERGES) You did well, Verges, honestly. (to LEONATO) Well, God’s a fair man. If two men are riding on one horse, one must naturally ride behind. Verges is as honest a man as any, but, God bless him, not all men are created equal. Am I right, my friend?

LEONATO
Indeed, neighbor, he comes too short of you.
LEONATO
Truly, my friend, he isn’t nearly as impressive as you are.

DOGBERRY
Gifts that God gives.
DOGBERRY
God gives those gifts—I had nothing to do with it.

LEONATO
I must leave you.
LEONATO
Now I must return to the wedding.


40
DOGBERRY
One word, sir. Our watch, sir, have indeed comprehended
two aspicious persons, and we would have them this
morning examined before your worship.
DOGBERRY
One more thing, sir. Our watch, sir, as you know, has comprehended two auspicious persons. We’d like for you to examine them this morning.


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