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Much Ado About Nothing

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DON PEDRO
What, sigh for the toothache?
DON PEDRO
What, are you moaning on about your toothache?

LEONATO
Where is but a humor or a worm.
LEONATO
It could only have been caused by some humor or

worm

Most illnesses were attributed to bodily fluids or parasites.

worm
.

BENEDICK
Well, everyone can master a grief but he that has it.
BENEDICK
Well, everyone knows how to overcome an injury except the one who actually has one.

CLAUDIO
Yet say I, he is in love.
CLAUDIO
I repeat, he’s in love.

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30
DON PEDRO
There is no appearance of fancy in him, unless it be a fancy
that he hath to strange disguises, as to be a Dutchman
today, a Frenchman tomorrow, or in the shape of two
countries at once, as a German from the waist downward,
all slops, and a Spaniard from the hip upward, no doublet.
Unless he have a fancy to this foolery, as it appears he hath,
he is no fool for fancy, as you would have it appear he is.
DON PEDRO
No, there’s no love in him, unless you mean his love for strange costumes. He’s a Dutchman today, a Frenchman tomorrow, and sometimes wears the clothing of two countries at once: a German from the waist down, with his baggy pants, and a Spaniard from the hips up, with a cloak and no jacket. Unless you’re talking about his love for this kind of foolishness—which, judging from his appearance, he has—he is no fool for love, as you pretend.



CLAUDIO
If he be not in love with some woman, there is no believing
old signs. He brushes his hat o' mornings. What should
that bode?
CLAUDIO
If he’s not in love with a woman, then you can’t trust the usual symptoms. He brushes his hat in the mornings. What do you think that means?

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DON PEDRO
Hath any man seen him at the barber’s?
DON PEDRO
Has any man seen him at the barber’s?


CLAUDIO
No, but the barber’s man hath been seen with him, and the
old ornament of his cheek hath already stuffed tennis balls.
CLAUDIO
No, but the barber’s assistant has been seen with him. The beard that used to decorate Benedick’s cheeks has been shaved off and is now stuffing

tennis balls

Tennis balls used to be stuffed with hair.

tennis balls
.

LEONATO
Indeed, he looks younger than he did, by the loss of a beard.
LEONATO
Getting rid of the beard definitely makes him look younger.


40
DON PEDRO
Nay, he rubs himself with civet. Can you smell him out by
that?
DON PEDRO
And he’s rubbed himself with perfume. Can you smell out his secret now?

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