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165



LEAR
If thou wilt weep my fortunes, take my eyes.
I know thee well enough. Thy name is Gloucester.
Thou must be patient. We came crying hither.
Thou know’st the first time that we smell the air
We wawl and cry. I will preach to thee. Mark me.
LEAR
If you want to cry over my bad luck, I’ll give you my eyes. I know you. Your name’s Gloucester. You have to be patient with me. I came here crying. The first time we see the world as newborns, we cry and scream. I’ll read you a sermon. Listen to this.

170
GLOUCESTER
Alack, alack the day!
GLOUCESTER
Oh, how awful!





175
LEAR
When we are born, we cry that we are come
To this great stage of fools. This a good block.
It were a delicate stratagem to shoe
A troop of horse with felt. I’ll put ’t in proof.
And when I have stol'n upon these sons-in-law,
Then, kill, kill, kill, kill, kill, kill!
LEAR
When we’re born, we cry because we’ve arrived on the stage of life, like all the other fools. That’s a nice hat you’ve got there. How ingenious to make horseshoes out of felt. I’ll test it out. And when I’ve sneaked up on my sons-in-law, then I’ll kill, kill, kill, kill, kill, kill!
Enter GENTLEMAN with two others
The GENTLEMAN enters with two other gentlemen.


GENTLEMAN
Oh, here he is. Lay hand upon him.—Sir,
Your most dear daughter—
GENTLEMAN
(noticing LEAR) Oh, here he is. Grab him.—Sir, your most dear daughter—


180

LEAR
No rescue? What, a prisoner? I am even
The natural fool of fortune. Use me well.
You shall have ransom. Let me have surgeons.
I am cut to th' brains.
LEAR
What, I’m a prisoner? No rescue for me? My luck has always been bad. Treat me well. There’s a ransom. I need a doctor. My brains are injured.

GENTLEMAN
   You shall have anything.
GENTLEMAN
You can have anything you want.



185
LEAR
No seconds? All myself?
Why, this would make a man a man of salt,
To use his eyes for garden water-pots,
Ay, and laying autumn’s dust.
LEAR
Will no one back me up? Am I all alone? That would make anyone cry enough to water his garden with his tears.

GENTLEMAN
     Good sir—
GENTLEMAN
Good sir—

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