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SILENCE
By 'r Lady, I think he be, but Goodman Puff of Barson.
SILENCE
I swear, I think he is—except for the good fellow Puff, from Barson.


80



PISTOL
Puff?
Puff in thy teeth, most recreant coward base!—
Sir John, I am thy Pistol and thy friend,
And helter-skelter have I rode to thee,
And tidings do I bring, and lucky joys,
And golden times, and happy news of price.
PISTOL
Puff? Puff in your face, you degenerate coward! Sir John, I’m your Pistol and your friend, and I rode at full tilt to find you here. I bring you reports, and good luck, and golden times, and happy, valuable news.

85
FALSTAFF
I pray thee now, deliver them like a man of this world.
FALSTAFF
Then please, deliver this news like a human being who lives in this world.


PISTOL
A foutre for the world and worldlings base!
I speak of Africa and golden joys.
PISTOL
Damn this world, and the vile little people who live in it! I’m talking about Africa, and its golden joys.


FALSTAFF
O base Assyrian knight, what is thy news?
Let King Cophetua know the truth thereof.
FALSTAFF

90
SILENCE
(sings) And Robin Hood, Scarlet, and John.
SILENCE



PISTOL
Shall dunghill curs confront the Helicons,
And shall good news be baffled?
Then, Pistol, lay thy head in Furies' lap.
PISTOL
Will junkyard dogs attack the Muses, goddesses of poetry? Will my good news be thwarted this way? Then Pistol, go ahead and plead with the Furies, the goddesses of revenge.

SILENCE
Honest gentleman, I know not your breeding.
SILENCE
Honest gentleman, I don’t know what kind of family you’re from.

95
PISTOL
Why then, lament therefor.
PISTOL
That’s your loss.

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Henry IV Parts One and Two (No Fear Shakespeare)