No Fear Shakespeare
Henry IV Part 2
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Act 2, Scene 4, Page 2
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Enter MISTRESS QUICKLY and DOLL TEARSHEET
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MISTRESS QUICKLY and DOLL TEARSHEET enter. | |
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MISTRESS QUICKLY
I' faith, sweetheart, methinks now you are in an excellent
good temperality. Your pulsidge beats as extraordinarily as
heart would desire, and your color, I warrant you, is as red
as any rose, in good truth, la. But, i' faith, you have drunk
too much canaries, and that’s a marvellous searching wine,
and it perfumes the blood ere one can say “What’s this?”
How do you now?
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MISTRESS QUICKLY
I swear, sweetheart, you seem to be in a great temporality. Your pulsidge is beating as strongly as you could want, and your color is as red as a rose; truly! But seriously, I do think you’ve drank too much of that sweet wine from the Canary Islands—it’s a mighty powerful drink, and it’ll get into your blood faster than you can say, “What’s this?” How are you feeling now?
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DOLL TEARSHEET
Better than I was. Hem.
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DOLL TEARSHEET
Better than I was before. (she coughs or belches)
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MISTRESS QUICKLY
Why, that’s well said. A good heart’s worth gold.
Lo, here comes Sir John.
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MISTRESS QUICKLY
Well said! A healthy heart is worth its weight in gold. Look, here comes Sir John.
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Enter FALSTAFF
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FALSTAFF enters. | |
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FALSTAFF
(sings) When Arthur first in court—Empty the jordan.
(sings) And was a worthy king—How now, Mistress Doll?
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FALSTAFF
(singing)
“When Arthur first in court”—somebody empty the chamber pot! “And was a worthy king”—how are you, Mistress Doll?
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MISTRESS QUICKLY
Sick of a calm, yea, good faith.
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MISTRESS QUICKLY
She’s sick of a qualm, she is.
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FALSTAFF
So is all her sect. An they be once in a calm, they are sick.
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FALSTAFF
That’s how all the women in her profession are. As soon as they’re calm—and not in someone’s bed—they get sick.
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DOLL TEARSHEET
A pox damn you, muddy rascal. Is that all the comfort you
give me?
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DOLL TEARSHEET
You stupid bastard. Is this how you make me feel better?
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FALSTAFF
You make fat rascals, Mistress Doll.
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FALSTAFF
You make fat bastards, Mistress Doll.
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