No Fear Shakespeare

Henry IV Part 1

William Shakespeare

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Act 2, Scene 1

Original Text

Modern Text

Enter a CARRIER with a lantern in his hand
FIRST CARRIER enters, holding a lantern.

FIRST CARRIER
Heigh-ho! An it be not four by the day, I’ll be hanged. Charles’s Wain is over the new chimney, and yet our horse not packed.—What, ostler!
FIRST CARRIER
I’ll be damned if it isn’t 4 A.M. already. The Big Dipper has already risen above the chimney, and our horses aren’t ready yet. Hey, ostler!

OSTLER
(within) Anon, anon.
OSTLER
(offstage) Just a second!

5
FIRST CARRIER
I prithee, Tom, beat Cut’s saddle. Put a few flocks in the point. Poor jade is wrung in the withers out of all cess.
FIRST CARRIER
Hey, Tom, give the saddle of my horse, Cut, a few whacks to soften it up, and stuff some wool under it—the old nag’s got some bad bruises on her shoulders.
Enter another CARRIER
SECOND CARRIER enters.

SECOND CARRIER
Peas and beans are as dank here as a dog, and that is the next way to give poor jades the bots. This house is turned upside down since Robin ostler died.
SECOND CARRIER
The feed here’s as damp as anything. That’s a fast way for a horse to get parasites. This stable’s upside down since Ostler Robin died.

10
FIRST CARRIER
Poor fellow never joyed since the price of oats rose. It was the death of him.
FIRST CARRIER
Poor guy. Once the price of oats went up, he was never happy again. It killed him.

SECOND CARRIER
I think this be the most villanous house in all London road for fleas. I am stung like a tench.
SECOND CARRIER
This stable’s got worse fleas than any in London. I’m stung like a tench.

FIRST CARRIER
Like a tench? By the Mass, there is ne'er a king christen could be better bit than I have been since the first cock.
FIRST CARRIER
Like a tench? I’m telling you, not even a king could be bitten more than I’ve been bitten since midnight.

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