No, believe me, 'tis very cold. The wind is
northerly.
HAMLET
No, I'm telling you, it's very cold, with a
northerly wind.
OSRIC
It is indifferent cold, my lord, indeed.
OSRIC
It is rather cold, indeed, my lord.
HAMLET
But yet methinks it is very sultry and hot for my
complexion.
HAMLET
And yet I feel it's very hot and humid, which is bad
for my complexion.
OSRIC
Exceedingly, my lord. It is very sultry—as
'twere—I cannot
105
tell how. My lord, his majesty bade me signify to you that
he has laid a great wager on your head. Sir, this is the
matter—
OSRIC
Yes indeed it is, sir. Very humid, I can't tell you how
humid it is. My lord, His Majesty wanted me to tell you that
he's placed a large bet on you. This is what
it's all about—
HAMLET
I beseech you,
remember—(indicates that
OSRIC
should put
on his hat)
HAMLET
Please, I beg
you—(he points
to
OSRIC
's
hat)
OSRIC
Nay, good my lord, for mine ease, in good faith. Sir, here is
110
newly come to court Laertes, believe me, an absolute
gentleman, full of most excellent differences, of very soft
society and great showing. Indeed, to speak feelingly of
him, he is the card or calendar of gentry, for you shall find
in him the continent of what part a gentleman would see.
OSRIC
No, my lord, I'm comfortable like this, thank you. Sir,
there's someone named Laertes who's recently
come to the court. He's an absolute gentleman, totally
outstanding in so many respects, very easy in society, and
displaying all his excellent qualities. If I were to expose my true
feelings about him, I'd have to say he's like
a business card for the upper classes—he's
that wonderful. You'll find that he's the sum
total of what a perfect gentleman should be.*
HAMLET
115
Sir, his definement suffers no perdition in you, though I
know to divide him inventorially would dizzy th'
arithmetic of memory, and yet but yaw neither, in respect of his
quick sail.
HAMLET
Sir, your description of him doesn't detract from his
good qualities, though I know that trying to list them all would
make your head spin, and even so you wouldn't be able to
keep up with him.
