No Fear Shakespeare
Hamlet
Get this No Fear to go!
Act 5, Scene 1, Page 3
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Now
thou dost ill to say the gallows is built stronger than the church.
Argal, the gallows may do well to thee. To ’t again,
come.
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Now, it’s wrong to say that the gallows are stronger
than a church. Therefore, the gallows may do
you some good. Come on, your
turn.
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OTHER
“Who builds stronger than a mason, a shipwright, or a
carpenter?”
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OTHER
Let’s see, “Who builds stronger things than
a stonemason, a shipbuilder, or a carpenter?”
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GRAVEDIGGER
Ay, tell me that, and unyoke.
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GRAVEDIGGER
That’s the question, so answer it.
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OTHER
Marry, now I can tell.
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OTHER
Ah, I’ve got it!
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GRAVEDIGGER
To ’t.
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GRAVEDIGGER
Go ahead.
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OTHER
Mass, I cannot tell.
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OTHER
Damn, I forgot.
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Enter HAMLET and
HORATIO afar off |
HAMLET and HORATIO
enter in the distance. |
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GRAVEDIGGER
Cudgel thy brains no more about it, for your dull ass will
not mend his pace with beating. And when you are asked
this question next, say “A grave-maker.” The
houses that
he makes last till doomsday. Go, get thee in. Fetch me a
stoup of liquor.
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GRAVEDIGGER
Don’t beat your brains out over it. You
can’t make a slow donkey run by beating it. The next time
someone asks you this riddle, say “a
gravedigger.” The houses he makes last till Judgment Day.
Now go and get me some booze.
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Exit OTHER
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The OTHER GRAVEDIGGER
exits. |
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(digs and sings)
In youth when I did love, did
love,
Methought it was
very sweet
To
contract–o–the time,
for–a–my behove,
Oh, methought,
there–a–was
nothing–a–meet.
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(the GRAVEDIGGER
digs and sings)
In my youth I loved, I
loved,
And I thought it was
very sweet
To
set—ohh—the date
for—ahh—my duty
Oh, I thought
it—ahh—was not right.
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HAMLET
Has this fellow no feeling of his business? He sings at grave-
making.
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HAMLET
Doesn’t this guy realize what he’s doing?
He’s singing while digging a grave.
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