No Fear Shakespeare
As You Like It
Get this No Fear to go!
Act 5, Scene 1, Page 3
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TOUCHSTONE
Then learn this of me: to have is to have. For it is a figure in
rhetoric that drink, being poured out of a cup into a glass,
by filling the one doth empty the other. For all your writers
do consent that ipse is “he.” Now, you are not ipse, for I am
he.
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TOUCHSTONE
Then learn this from me: if you have something, you have it. Everyone knows that when you pour a drink out of a cup and into a glass, the cup becomes empty. And all the authorities know that ipse is Latin for “he.” You are no longer ipse, because I am he.
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WILLIAM
Which he, sir?
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WILLIAM
Which he, sir?
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TOUCHSTONE
He, sir, that must marry this woman. Therefore, you
clown, abandon—which is, in the vulgar, “leave”—the
society—which in the boorish is “company”—of this
female—which in the common is “woman”; which
together is, abandon the society of this female, or, clown,
thou perishest; or, to thy better understanding, diest; or, to
wit, I kill thee, make thee away, translate thy life into death,
thy liberty into bondage. I will deal in poison with thee, or
in bastinado, or in steel. I will bandy with thee in faction. I
will o'errun thee with policy. I will kill thee a hundred and
fifty ways. Therefore tremble and depart.
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TOUCHSTONE
Why, the he that will marry this woman. Therefore, idiot, abandon (or, in common language, “leave”) the society (which in the boorish tongue is “company”) of this female—maybe you’ll get it if I say “woman,” instead. Say it all at once, now: abandon the society of this female, or, simpleton, you’ll perish. Let me put it in a way you’ll understand: you’ll die. Or, rather, I’ll kill you, or I’ll do away with you, or I’ll turn your life into death and your freedom into captivity. I’ll poison you, or beat you with a club, or stab you with a sword. I’ll bandy you about and overwhelm you with my cleverness. I will, in other words, kill you in three hundred and fifty ways. Therefore, tremble with fear and leave.
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AUDREY
Do, good William.
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AUDREY
Do what he says, William.
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WILLIAM
God rest you merry, sir.
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WILLIAM
Farewell, sir.
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Exit |
He exits. |
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Enter CORIN
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CORIN enters. |
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CORIN
Our master and mistress seeks you. Come away, away.
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CORIN
Our master and mistress are looking for you. Let’s go.
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TOUCHSTONE
Trip, Audrey, trip, Audrey.—I attend, I attend.
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TOUCHSTONE
Hurry up, Audrey, hurry.—I’m coming, I’m coming.
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Exeunt |
They all exit. |
